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SEINFELD SHOW PULLED
The Seinfeld re-run episode where George Costanza's fiancée dies from licking tainted wedding invitations has been pulled after the anthrax scares.

MY KIND OF BANK
A woman in Briain got a little more than she asked for at her bank when requesting a loan. Susan Anderson wanted $5,700 to pay off debts. The Halifax bank. which uses the slogan "Always giving you extra," did just that and sent her a check for more than $13 million.

ENDANGERED SPECIES(Oh Come ON!)
BART, The Bay Area Rapid Transport system will pay over $1 Million after an endangered garter snake was flattened during a construction project. They're paying a contractor $1.7 Mil after the contractor had to stop work for 18 days so wildlife experts could investigate the death of the flattened reptile.The multi-colored snake, often described as one of the rarest and most beautiful snakes in North America, is believed to number fewer than 1,500 in the wild.

ANOTHER SNAKE STORY
The snake or the kids....A Canadian couple may soon be forced to make a decision; either get rid of the family's 16.5-foot python or risk having their young children removed from the house. The Koops say the pet is no threat to the family.
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ACID Music 2.0 on sale....Unlimited tracks .Burn your songs to compact disc with Track-at-Once CD burning .Apply effects with Sonic Foundry ExpressFX DirectX Audio Plug-Ins.Record instruments or voice .Preview any loop before adding it to the mix. Just $59.99 at http://AudioPros.com

MCCARTNEY CAR ACCIDENT
Sir Paul was involved in a car accident right before his NY Benfit performance. He complained of some back pain, but otherwise seemed ok. The New York Post reported that Sir Paul's hired car hit another car and veered into a tree - but neither driver was charged by police.

CHARLIE DANIELS
The country rocker opted out of a planned appearance at last week's Country Freedom Concert in Nashville. Why ? Clear Channel and CMT asked that he not perform his song "That ain't no rag it's a flag" because they thought lyrics like: "This ain't no rag it's a flag, and we don't wear it on our heads" would be offensive. "If the song is offensive, I figured my presence there also would be offensive," he told The Hollywood Reporter. Sales of the CD have skyrocketed through his website.
 
PINK FLOYD ON THE ROAD?
Probably not. Even though ECHOES will be released November 6th, several members of the group have been cautioning fans not to expect a supporting tour anytime soo.

HOTTEST CELEBRITY BODIES
Celebrity Bodies magazine held a poll on the hottest celeb bodies:
Women: 1 Jennifer Lopez 2 Catherine Zeta Jones 3 Elle Macpherson 4 Angelina Jolie 5 Geri Halliwell 6 Naomi Campbell 7 Kate Winslet 8 Kelly Brook 9 Jennifer Aniston 10 Cameron Diaz
Men: 1 David Beckham 2 Prince William 3 George Clooney 4 Mark Wahlberg 5 Dougray Scott 6 Jude Law 7 Brad Pitt 8 Jamie Oliver 9 Robbie Williams 10 Ewan McGregor
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Recording software and hardware plus musical instruments: Search for items for your home studio.
http://AudioPros.com/MusiciansFriend/mfrecord.htm
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FANTASY ISLAND THE REALITY SHOW
NBC is taking the premise of the show that starred Ricardo Montabaln and turning it into a reality show. The new series will take real people and put them on an island resort where one of their wishes or desires is fulfilled. The results are apparently not always what people had hoped. Be careful what you wish for....

CRUISE AND CRUZ
The National Enquirer is reporting that Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz are already house shopping in Greenwich, Connecticut and that Cruise popped the marriage question and the hot Spanish star quickly agreed.

 20th ANNIVERSARY RELEASE
Spielberg is getting ready for the anniversary re-release of ET in March with additional footage and some changes as well as digital manipulation to make some changes: Some of the differences:
* The lovable title character will now be seen taking a bath with his friend Elliot. The scene originally was cut because the "performance" of the animatronic puppet that played E.T. wasn't good enough. They edited it digitally
* The police who chase the children and E.T. will now carry walkie-talkies instead of guns. (Spielberg was upset that he put guns in the original)
* The Halloween sequence in which the children search for E.T. is longer.
* • Elliot's mother no longer forbids him to go out on Halloween as a terrorist. Now she forbids him to go out as a hippie. (Terrorist just doesn't seem appropriate)
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Books on radio and the voice over biz visit:
http://AudioPros.com/books.htm
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RULES FOR BEING A GUY
It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances:
a. When a heroic dog dies to save it's master
b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse
c. After wrecking your boss' Ferrari
d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into The Crying Game
Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
Acceptable excuse for not helping a friend move: Your legs have been severed in a freak threshing accident.
If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her.
The minimum amount of time you have to wait for a guy who's running late is 5 minutes. Maximum.
Complaining about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. Gripe at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. (in fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional).
When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
It is permissible to quaff a fruity chick drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach....and it's delivered by a topless supermodel...and it's free.
Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem---you didn't see nothin'.
Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a buffalo wing clean.
Never join your girlfriend or wife in dissing a buddy of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
You cannot rat out a coworker who shows up at work with a massive hangover. You may however, hide the aspirin, smear his chair with limburger cheese, turn the brightness dial all the way down so he thinks his monitor is broken, and have him paged over the loudspeaker every seven minutes.
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RANDOM THOUGHTS
1. The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and  stupidity
 2. If at first you don't succeed,  skydiving is not for you.
 3. Money can't buy happiness,  but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
 4. Deja moo!! The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
 5. Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people is mentally
ill.  Check three friends. If they're OK, you're it.
 6. Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.
 7. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a
unicorn.
 8. It has recently been discovered that research
causes cancer in rats.
 9. Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.
 10. If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
 11. Corollary: If you are given a take-home test,  you will forget where you live.
 12. The trouble with doing something right the
first time is that  nobody appreciates how difficult it was.
 13. It may be that your sole purpose in life is
simply to serve as a  warning to others.
 14. TJ's Law: You can't fall off the floor.
 15. The average woman would rather have beauty than brains,  because the average man can see better than
he can think.
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TONS OF JOKES HERE:
http://audiopros.com/AudioProsJokesPage.htm
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Toddler Property Laws
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my hand, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine. If it's
mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are
mine.
If it looks like mine, it's mine.
If I saw it first, it's mine.
If you are playing with something and you put it down,
it automatically becomes mine.
If it's broken, it's yours.
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